Dear Sofia

I decide to let the ink dry. 🙂 In Shaa Allah.
May Allah ease this journey, amin ❤

Bismillah,

It took me lots of courage to say that and I am glad I said it.
Rasa cam big gurlll gituu.

I wonder if I will refill my ink or let it dry.
I am still waiting for the answer.

Bismillah,

I start my morning today reading sister Fadhilah’s post on Instagram, lots of things that can be learned from her writing.
Then I listen to sister Aida Azlin videos while preparing myself and eating my cup of warm oat. Ever since I came back to S I always have oat as my breakfast. Alhamdulillah keeps my tummy full until my next meal.
So yeah that is all for now hiks ❤ I am just feel like writting before I start study.
Hope everything goes well today and May He bless us always amin ❤
(0946//060720)

(1655)

It’s raining cats and dogs, aaaa the cool breeze feel so nice.
Alhamdulillah.

(1725)

I just performed my prayer. After giving my salam I feel calm just sitting there in the surau and tell Him everything that kept deep inside. Knowing that He already knows how I feel and He even knows what I don’t know makes me feel safe because I believe He will never hurt me and He understands me more than anyone else can.

Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Allah says: ‘I am just as My slave thinks I am, (i.e. I am able to do for him what he thinks I can do for him) and I am with him if He remembers Me. If he remembers Me in himself, I too, remember him in Myself; and if he remembers Me in a group of people, I remember him in a group that is better than they; and if he comes one span nearer to Me, I go one cubit nearer to him; and if he comes one cubit nearer to Me, I go a distance of two outstretched arms nearer to him; and if he comes to Me walking, I go to him running.’ “

(2315)

I ate butter chicken again today just because I never tried butter chicken from that restaurant. Alhamdulillah my perut happy hiks ❤

Alhamdulillah for today ❤

Bismillah,

To my bolat Neko,
My orange cat that likes to brush its fur against my leg,
Biting my toes when I want to hang some clothes,
Accompany me when I need to do some chores,
Ran towards me when I come back home,
Thank you for being there.

To my Neko,
Who always “amin” kan my dua,
Who pray for me and my family,
Who protects his little family,
Thank you for being there.

To my Neko,
Who listens to my story when I am over the moon,
and who always there to hear I rant,
Accompany me when sadness overwhelmed me,
When I just want to be alone,
Thank you for being there.

To my Neko,
Who always wait patiently beside the door,
When it tummy can’t stop grumbling,
Thank you for eating well,
Thank you for being there.

To my Neko,
I will miss spraying water just to see you hop like a bunny,
I will miss accompany you to eat,
I will miss studying while watching you play,
I will miss every little thing,
Thank you for being there.

To my Neko,
I am sorry if I ever neglect you,
or hurt your feelings in any way,
I am sorry for not hugging you long enough when we last met,
I am sorry for not being there today.

I am really glad He sent you and your family ❤
I promise to take good care of your family, okie?
Have a nice rest my Neko.

Bismillah,

I try to get a grip of myself,
I try to swallow the pain,
I try to hold myself not to break down again,
But as soon I recite that surah,
A tear rolled down my face,
I pause to catch my breath again,
I keep reminding myself of Him,
So I can accept everything with an open heart,
“He is Ar Rahman, He is Ar Rahim.”
I said to myself “My heart breaks so He can enter.”
That word keeps repeating in my mind,
I put my head on my turquoise sejadah,
I imagine that He is next beside me,
Hugging my little soul,
Comforting me with all His love,
“He knows what is the best for you, be patient.”

Bismillah,
I just finished doing my skincare routine, aaaa my skin feel so fresh alhamdulillah although few visitor mai pulak hmmmm….
Today I went to R building to settle an errand, alhamdulillah it went well.
I was quite blur nak pergi R building (without bayar grab) so I wait for people who wear R employee ID card to pass by.
I also met NAA. Pia datang awal sangat sebab tak nak bayar duit grab.

NAA belanja me roti canai and hot milo hehe tentiuuu ! May Allah bless you NAA!
but i ate it at home haha sebab tak jumpa tempat sesuai untuk makey.
First time I saw NAA time gi dinner, but first time cakap masa gi hiking.
Hahaha we just met last week (we went for an “adventure”)

Then bila sampai balik rumah I saw the roses along bought from cameron haha somehow it remind me of A. I remember A sent me a picture of red flower (ni serious dah lama-during high school) and A said he liked red colour.

Petang pulak jemput si kecik from school.
Then little S ajak painting with little Y. We had fun painting some cupcakes.

Tomorrow will be a hectic day I guess? Hope everything okay aja hiks In Shaa Allah.

Bismillah,

Nothing happened much today, but i ate a lot. Zzzzz my tummy rasa so bolat 😂 but tomorrow will be a busy day! Ouh and my brother A baru je pass kan my stuff weeeee I’m so excited!

Bismillah,

Sometimes your inner voice talks louder than your heart and mind can bear,
Don’t suppress it,
Let it flow,
Let it out,
Acknowledge those feelings that flow in you,
You need to acknowledge those feelings to get through,
To learn,
To grow,
Be kind to yourself,
Say kind words to your inner self,
Because everyone’s feelings is valid.

Every time I feel down I always bayangkan big me is giving hugs to smoll me to lift me up again.
Warm the cockles of my heart. ❤️

[Verse 1]
I feel like I’m losing myself in the
Many emotions that have gone by
From some point, I became used to
The rules I follow to hide my heart

[Verse 2]
How far have I come now
I ran, only looking forward
Now I’m scared to look back
The words I’ve postponed

[Pre-Chorus]
Like time passes, inside of me
Times when I’m happy, days where
I cried so much my chest went numb
Like the sun that rises and sets every day
And the moon, I send them away naturally

[Chorus]
Sometimes I cry (Ay, yo)
Sometimes I laugh (Ay, yo)
I have expectations (Ay, yo)
And I go through pain (Ay, yo) (Ay, yo)
I get butterflies once again (Ay, yo)
And become dull (Ay, yo)
Following my heart, the way that I am

[Post-Chorus]
Like the countless stars
I’m always in the same place
I’ll shine on you with all the light I have
So don’t hide yourself, will you show me you?
Be comfortable with the way you are
That’s right, it’s okay to be okay

[Verse 3]
Today, for the first time
I face my honest heart
Even looking in the mirror is hard
Why is this facial expression so awkward?

[Verse 4]
Beautiful things are always precious
Even if you stay for a while and then leave
Like the ordinary occurrences I see everyday
Somehow I still want to fill up my daily life

[Pre-Chorus]
The loneliness that’s stayed hidden inside
Let it linger for a little
Just look at it
If the soft breeze blows
Open your heart, the day will pass

[Chorus]
Sometimes I cry (Ay, yo)
Sometimes I laugh (Ay, yo)
I have expectations (Ay, yo)
And I go through pain (Ay, yo) (Ay, yo)
I get butterflies once again (Ay, yo)
And become dull (Ay, yo)
Following my heart, the way that I am

[Post-Chorus]
Like the countless stars
I’m always in the same place
I’ll shine on you with all the light I have
So don’t hide yourself, will you show me you?
Be comfortable with the way you are
That’s right, it’s okay to be okay

[Bridge]
The memories that fill both hands
Our precious story
A sincere heart
If you can still remember them after time passes
Will you be able to say
That you were happy too?

[Chorus]
I cried with you (Ay, yo)
And we laughed together (Ay, yo)
I had expectations (Ay, yo)
And I went through pain (Ay, yo)
I poured out everything (Ay, yo)
And I loved (Ay, yo)
Following my heart, the way that I am

[Post-Chorus]
The troubles you couldn’t talk about
The spots with deep scars
The time passing at the same pace
Like always, I’ll wash them away
So it’s okay to live like flowing water
It’s just okay to be okay